Time after Time 

Reblogged from my old blog A Healing Love

I can’t count how many times I have surrendered what I thought was my next big dream, falling back on what is familiar to rebuild and begin again. We’re these dreams wasted? Not at all. From each experience and dream, there were skills, knowledge and faith in myself added to the growing repertoire that is my life. 

I don’t believe I’m alone in this, I think it’s actually more common than most of us would like to believe. Some forty odd years ago I wanted desperately to be a teacher, that was my dream. When that became a reality, I loved it. But, it wasn’t fulfilling. It was a rough point in my marriage, and I needed more from my day job. More money to support myself, interaction with adults and most of all I needed to be challenged more. 

Over the coming years I tried a variety of things, always moving on searching for a career that would fulfill my desire to live life to its fullest. I wanted challenge, busy days and I wanted to learn new things. Accounting fell into my lap quite by accident on a routine visit to my accountants office. Interestingly enough, many years prior to this I had completed a career questionnaire in high school. The result was an even tie between teaching and accounting. But yet I had not even considered it.  

Sitting at a desk all day, conversing with other colleagues, attending classes and seminars made me smile. I loved how it all fit with raising my kids, lots of travel opportunities and constantly learning new accounting skills. I was no longer surrounded by adorable kids in my classroom and coincidentally found I had more patience with my own kids. I was evolving into a better parent, applying what I had learned for teaching school in my house rather than in a classroom. 

When my daughter died it was with bone crushing mental and physical pain that I realized, perhaps for the very first time that there are no guarantees in life. I had the need to create a life that made me proud, offered me opportunities to experience everything and anything I wanted, wished or dreamed of NOW! Take a moment to look at your own life, you are the conductor in charge of making your life the best it can be. Don’t put off change, embrace it.

Over the last couple of years, I have once again moved in a few different directions. As most of you are aware I wrote and published two novels, began this blog and took a position in retail sales. None of these had been even attempted prior to this, the time just felt right, so I did it. 

Time after time I find myself returning to what I know and still love. At this point I’m back at a new accounting/finance position that looks to be a busy job full of multi-tasking and learning. I find myself enjoying being back in familiar territory once again and I am very excited to see where it leads. 

As you can see, some parts of each position I have held over the last forty done odd years is being used. It has immeasurable value. It is part of exactly who I am, and adds to the person I have become. 
Following my instinct, looking forward rather than back, and making every moment count. In short, treasuring each and every day of this journey. 

The Cyndi Lauper tune, “Time After Time” came on the radio yesterday and the lyrics are so incredible I wanted to share. I heard it for the first time so many years ago, and I still love the lyrics. They were and still are very representative of my life.

Lying in my bed I hear the clock tick, And think of you

Caught up in circles confusion, Is nothing new

Flashback – warm nights, Almost left behind
Suitcases of memories, Time after –
Sometimes you picture me, I’m walking too far ahead
You’re calling to me, I can’t hear. What you’ve said 
Then you say – go slow -I fall behind –
The second hand unwinds

If you’re lost you can look – and you will find me

Time after time
If you fall I will catch you – I’ll be waiting 
Time after time
After my picture fades and darkness has Turned to gray
Watching through windows – you’re wondering If I’m OK

Secrets stolen from deep inside The drum beats out of time

If you’re lost…
…Time after time

Time after time
Time after time
Time after time


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